I started meditating in 2007.

I’d been battling depression for 10 years and was looking for strategies to help me feel better.

I was drawn to Buddhist philosophy and started reading books by the Dalai Lama and Thich Nhat Hanh. I first learned about meditation through these books.

I started researching the practice of meditation more thoroughly.

I came across the work on Jon Kabat-Zinn, a professor and founder of the Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction (MBSR) Clinic at the University of Massachusetts Medical School.

Kabat-Zinn’s blend of science and spirituality attracted me.

So I started meditating.

It was hard.

When I meditated, I felt bored and my mind raced. Still, I wanted to continue. Kabat-Zinn explained that boredom and a busy mind are common and even useful during meditation.

I sensed the practice was something I needed to stick with to overcome depression.

Won’t people think I’m weird?

Thanks to Jon Kabat-Zinn and many others, meditation has become more mainstream in recent years.

It wasn’t always that way.

Many people used to think meditation is a “woo-woo” practice for people who are “out there.”

Despite feeling called to practice meditation, I was aware of this perception. I was afraid others would judge me. Nobody in my circles practiced meditation and I didn’t want anyone to know I was trying it out.

When I first started meditating in 2007, I woke up early in the morning to practice, while my wife was still sleeping.

One morning, she woke up while I was meditating. When I heard her walking down the stairs from our bedroom to the living room (where I was meditating), I sat up quickly and put my cushion away. I didn’t want her to see me.

She is the person who loves me most, yet I still feared her judgment.

Along with many perceiving meditation as a “woo-woo” practice, here are some other myths I’ve come across:

• Meditation is only for Buddhists

• You have to sit cross-legged on the floor to meditate

• The goal of meditation is to have no thoughts

Debunking the Myths

None of the myths I mentioned above are true.

There will always be people who think meditation is silly, but more and more people are buying in.

A CDC report from 2018 found that the popularity of meditation increased substantially between 2012 and 2017. I imagine this trend has continued from 2018 until today.

Is meditation only for Buddhists?

Definitely, not.

A 2018 article from the Pew Research Center indicates that meditation is common among many religious traditions:

Do you have to sit cross-legged on the floor to meditate?

Definitely not.

A traditional meditation posture can be helpful, but is not necessary.

This article details eight common postures, but ultimately your intent is more important than your posture.

There is no “right” or “wrong” meditation posture.

Is the goal of meditation to have no thoughts?

Definitely not.

You haven’t “failed” at meditation if you can’t stop thinking. Even experienced meditators have thoughts while practicing.

How you manage the thoughts that arise during meditation depends on the type of meditation you’re practicing.

When practicing mindfulness meditation, for example, notice any thoughts that arise without judgment, then intentionally shift your attention to a specific object of focus (often the breath).

Other forms of meditation promote inquiry into thoughts and/or noting any insights that arise.

My Favorite Meditation Structure

I laid out my favorite meditation structure in a recent Tweet:

Here are more details about each step:

Set Intention

Set a clear intention about what you want to accomplish during the meditaiton session.

I consider this a type of prayer, much like Christians pray before a meal or church service to focus their minds on God.

Here are some examples:

• Focus on the breath

• Focus on the flame of a candle

• Scan your body from head to toe

• Focus on the belly moving while breathing

• Notice any insights that arise about a specific problem

Settle Into Posture

As I mentioned above, there is no “right” or “wrong” meditation posture.

I’ve tried many postures. Through experimentation, the following two principles are more important (for me):

• Hips above the knees

• Spine and neck upright and aligned

I usually accomplish this by stacking two couch cushions on the floor and sitting in the the “quarter lotus” posture from this article (I’m not flexible enough for the half or full lotus positions).

I used to sit on a low Zafu cushion with my hips and knees even. This posture caused my legs to fall asleep after 20 minutes or so. It felt quite uncomfortable.

Whevever I don’t have access to couch cushions, I sit in a chair with a pillow behind my lower back to promote the spine alignment I desire.

I’ve also found that practicing lying meditation in bed helps me fall asleep.

I suggest experimenting with different postures. The best posure for you may be different.

Regardless, spend the first minute or two of each meditation session settling into your posture of choice. Allow yourself to move and adjust until your posture feels right before moving on.

Focus Attention

Next, focus your attention on a specific object.

I almost always focus on my breathing, but here are some other options:

• A specific part of your body

• A spot on the floor or wall in front of you

• The light of a candle placed in front of you on the floor

The object doesn’t matter as much as your focus.

Your singular goal is to stay focused on the object and nothing else.

Awareness

Inevitably, you will find that achieving this goal is very difficult at best.

Your focus will wander. Thoughts will arise.

You will think about:

• Your plans for the day

• Something that happened yesterday

• What you need to get at the grocery store

Thoughts like these will disrupt your focus, sometimes for long periods.

The key is to notice when your focus wanders. When you notice, you’ve succeeded.

Acceptance

Give yourself grace when your focus wanders.

This is a normal occurrence in meditation. You’re not a “bad” meditator because you can’t focus on your breath without thoughts creeping in.

Reframe every loss of focus as a “necessary” part of your meditation practice.

Refocus Attention

When you notice your focus wander, all you have to “do” is refocus.

It doesn’t matter how many times you lose focus, just keep refocusing.

Every time you refocus, you’re improving.

Note Insights

I follow this process whenever I have an insight during meditation:

This is optional (I don’t do it during every meditation session).

But I suggest this practice when your intention is to come up with insights regarding a specific situation.

If you’ve been wanting to start a meditation practice but don’t know how to get started, I highly recommend this structure.

If you’ve been meditating for years, try this structure.

Let me know how it goes.

Thank you for reading!

Matt